A gentle Dom's view

A Dom is gentle in his strength
and strong in his gentleness.
Anonymous asked: “While reading your wonderful tumblr, I just wondered whether you gained expercience in polyamory? I hope you don’t mind this very intimate question, I know some Doms (and also subs) in “open” or polyamorous relationships and I’m asking myself if it’s somehow connected to the lifestyle of bdsm.”Just to silence the quibblers: I do love languages, I’m fluent in four, have a decent knowledge of Latin and I’m fully aware of the fact that it is composed of the Greek “poly” and the Latin “amor” but so are words like television and homosexual, so just accept that such words exist and are commonly used. Polyamory is a concept that can work if people know from the beginning what they do and why they do it. From my experience, it is more common among kinksters as among vanilla people but it exists in both worlds. If you are wondering if it might be a way for you to go, ask yourself how you felt in your previous relationships with only one partner. Did you miss something there that you think you might have found with someone else? If so, it would surely be the best approach to speak openly with your partner about it, maybe it is the same for him and he would not mind giving you some freedom if he gains some freedom for himself that way as well. Thus, there would not be any need for secret stuff behind the other’s back and no collaps of the existing relationship should the secret become know for whichever reason later, besides, you would probably sleep better since you would not have to worry or feel guilty. However, if you do this, you should also ask yourself how good you could deal yourself with the knowledge that your partner was enjoying someone outside your relationship as well. If you think you can live with that, go ahead and give it a try. It might well be you find out your curiosity was the biggest attraction and once it was satisfied, it lost most of its appeal and you return to your monogamous relationship. But it might also be that you can really enjoy it and nobody apart from yourself will be able to tell you that, you need to find it out for yourself.

Anonymous asked: “While reading your wonderful tumblr, I just wondered whether you gained expercience in polyamory? I hope you don’t mind this very intimate question, I know some Doms (and also subs) in “open” or polyamorous relationships and I’m asking myself if it’s somehow connected to the lifestyle of bdsm.”

Just to silence the quibblers: I do love languages, I’m fluent in four, have a decent knowledge of Latin and I’m fully aware of the fact that it is composed of the Greek “poly” and the Latin “amor” but so are words like television and homosexual, so just accept that such words exist and are commonly used.

Polyamory is a concept that can work if people know from the beginning what they do and why they do it. From my experience, it is more common among kinksters as among vanilla people but it exists in both worlds.

If you are wondering if it might be a way for you to go, ask yourself how you felt in your previous relationships with only one partner. Did you miss something there that you think you might have found with someone else? If so, it would surely be the best approach to speak openly with your partner about it, maybe it is the same for him and he would not mind giving you some freedom if he gains some freedom for himself that way as well. Thus, there would not be any need for secret stuff behind the other’s back and no collaps of the existing relationship should the secret become know for whichever reason later, besides, you would probably sleep better since you would not have to worry or feel guilty.

However, if you do this, you should also ask yourself how good you could deal yourself with the knowledge that your partner was enjoying someone outside your relationship as well. If you think you can live with that, go ahead and give it a try. It might well be you find out your curiosity was the biggest attraction and once it was satisfied, it lost most of its appeal and you return to your monogamous relationship. But it might also be that you can really enjoy it and nobody apart from yourself will be able to tell you that, you need to find it out for yourself.

  1. katscratchkitty reblogged this from espineux and added:
    Sometimes it feels like this. ksk
  2. 6s-emme reblogged this from espineux
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  5. freish reblogged this from espineux and added:
    oh my lanta that is genuinely funny
  6. kimmacious reblogged this from espineux
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  11. kitten-overlord said: But also, a poly relationship can only work if everyone involved wants it. If one partner is only doing it to please the other, problems come up. Many relationships fail. Communication is key.
  12. nyxtumblingstars reblogged this from gentledom and added:
    love with two wonderful people. We...home for ourselves
  13. gentledom posted this